i didn’t get to see deadpool in the theaters this year. i did however, see just about everything else that came out last month. needless to say; spectre was mi favorite movie in theaters for the next five years &&& the db[ten] is effectively the sexiest car on earth, sike nahhh, the one-77 affectionately has mi heart butt uhhhhhhh… the new bugatti chiron has enough to make me flirt, if only i had a rich girlfriend to buy me all the things i dream…
one of the more interesting movies i’ve recently seen was tom hooper’s, ‘the danish girl.‘ of course, i was the only male in the theater and, when it ended i “boooo’d,” encouraging multiple women to stand and clap in ovation. i felt a little dumb butt uhhhhhh… you have got to wonder what some people are truly thinking in this post caitlyn jenner world.
i don’t know what made me walk into the theater to see that movie. i had never seen any trailers, nor had i heard anyone talking about it. the title just caught mi attention and seemed like the kind of movie i would like and, it was aesthetically. hooper did a good job making his film visually pleasing and flowing. i just don’t know if, upon leaving the theater, i, as a man, got from it the same thing a woman got out of it.
like i said, i slumped back in mi seat and “boooo’d” while many women followed me in opposition by standing and clapping. i wish they would of taken the time to try and understand where i was coming from as a man butt uhhhhh.. i guess everyone was just too caught up in their feelz.
the craze thing is the danish girl was not really a girl but, a man. einar was a danish artist who in an attempt to help one of his students perfect their craft married her and volunteered himself as her personal muse. one day she asked him to wear a dress because she wanted to paint and her model was unavailable, he showed hesitancy but as we all know, love will make you do craze things.
einar went from wearing the dress in private sessions with gerda to showing up at parties as his alter ego, lilli. gerda went from being a moderately chic female artist in her town to being one of the most famous artist in all of europe. einar told gerda of his discomforts and she had some too but, for fame they both were willing to ignore them. until one day gerda wanted to make love to her husband and it was lilli there in the bed awaiting. gerda had questions and einar eventually told her about some childhood playing that he had never quite gotten over. she suggested he seek medical help, which he ignored and ran from. all of the doctors offered him drugs and told him the same thing, he just didn’t agree with the diagnosis. gerda didn’t let up in her pursuits though, and perhaps never thought to just talk it out with her man. no, instead, she went into his childhood, found the man whom he had relations with as a young boy, hans, and brought him back up into his life, shouting it was now ‘their’ life. she put herself in danger, her unborn children [yes, he had the audacity to ask to help the couple bring a child into this world where they had asked for none], and lilli in danger. except, it wasn’t lilli that the strange man wanted, it was einar. when they were kids this machovist was a creep and even in adulthood he remained the same.
for me, here is where the story falls apart and you begin to see the agenda being pushed through women onto men. see, no woman is ok with rape, if it is happening to them butt uhhhhhh… if it is happening to a man, it can’t possibly bee rape because, they’ve taught us that all we want is sex. the first time einar stepped out as lilli he was sexually advanced by a man named henrik and he recoiled. i don’t think he wanted to bee touched by a man. gerda saw this, went to find his biggest nightmare and, bring it into his reality. what happened was, he was sexually advanced again, as well as herself. neither of them liked it but, his remainder of manhood was lost. through his wife’s persistence, he eventually began to consider the doctor’s advice and sought out a surgery that would allow him to transform himself into a woman. he did not in anyway feel like a man anymore and it literally killed him. i dont think there was any woman in the theater or on screen who was able to see how this was one of their own’s fault. all i think was transcribed was gerda dated a gay guy, it was emotionally hard for her, yet she became really famous, and she still paints pictures of him to bee nice. the end.
i AM more feminist than any of you hoes. the end.end.
i love disney movies and have been eager to see ‘pets’ since i saw the trailer butt uhhhhhh… zootopia did not disappoint in holding me over. it presented a message of believing in yourself and achieving your wildest dreams. as a professional creator, i AM mixed on the interest of mi pizza bakers becoming bankers but, still the movie possessed a lot of disney magic to wash those worries away and left order where it was best.
zootopia follows a cute little bunny [only bunnies are allowed to call other bunnies cute, btw, lol] to the big land of zootopia, which is reminiscent of the african savannah where gazelles and buffalo and cheetahs and hippos and lions are all getting along in harmony. when our cute little bunny [i bee hoppin around] first gets to the land of zootopia it becomes apparent she is in over her furry little rabbit ears and, it would bee hard for many to feel bad for her but, by the end of the movie things seem to work themselves out.
the movie does a good job by ignoring the differences between lions and cheetahs or mice and rabbits and brings to question a more primal instinct; prey vs. predators [homos vs. hetros??/ idk]. as mammals, we are all either prey or predator. and if you are not one of those then you are ascertainedly male or female.
disney does a good job bringing the issue to front by pairing the cute little female bunny cop with a sly and shifty little red fox. it’s great, and before long you’re left asking yourself, which one is the prey and which one is the predator???//
i don’t want to ruin the movie because, with all the ‘isms’ going around today it’d probably do you some good to see the movie for yourself but, i will say, even with the belief that you all could bee anything [which i don’t necessarily whole heartedly share], please don’t let rabbits and foxes start having babies together, i AM just not sure if that’s how it works with God even though, in a disney world the premise does sound adorable.
if you’re into politics and banking, i AM even though i admit to having problems counting numbers higher than a gazillion billion, go see the big short. being born the richest man in the world, i know all about money being fake and there’s no better way to prove this point than by using the american housing system as an example. it’s confusing to say the least but as far as things that don’t make sense making sense go, it makes sense. i just want someone to tell me how do white people end up selling the world for triple its worth at the same time as selling a book that suggests the world was inherited by a black man??/ like, they don’t really own anything, they just charge you for it since they killed person’s who’s it is. fuck a last will and testimony though.
anyway doe, since you asked; if i were stranded on an island and i had to choose one, leonardo dicaprio or brad pitt to bee mi man bitch for the next hundred years, who would i choose??/ i would choose brad pitt. not only is brad pitt one of the sexiest white guys on the planet earth next to tom brady butt uhhhhhh… brad also looks like he can swim, which means he’ll have no problem floating on over to the next island to go get some bitches and bring em back in time for the bonfire i had planned. he also look a little stronger up top which means we could do fun stuff like island races and, build boats and sell em for craze profits to other stranded passerbyers when we’re bored.
by now we’ve all made plans and canceled them to go see leonardo dicaprio in the revenant, i wasnt as lucky, though, i did manage to get two really good naps in.
the revenant is basically about white people trying to take over the world [no wonder they like it so much]. white people have moved to pre native america and started killing animals for their fur, to take back and sell on the larger continental mass [sideeye at russia]. killing native americans because they are breathing. killing some others because they speak a different laguage. and killing each other because they’re cutting into each other’s profits. in case you can’t tell, savagery is at an all time high.
everyone is efficiently gay, except dicaprio, who’s character’s name i cannot remember at the moment because he did such a good job that’s just dicaprio on screen. dicaprio has taken one of the native girls, impregnated her and had a son. everyone hates him for it because, it means he’s not white no more, or gay??/
long story short, they kill dicaprio’s son and leave dicaprio for dead himself, after a bear fight. dicaprio spends the rest of the movie trying to get back to camp to exact revenge on his perpetrators. he breaks every bone in his body and, contracts every illness known to man and, some how, a là antwone fisher, remains standing. his greatest feat perhaps, escaping from a group of native perps on horse, falling off the side of a cliff, surviving, and then cutting the head off the horse and degutting it to sleep inside the carcass overnight during a violent snowstorm. talk about cumming back from the dead!! dicaprio is one bad ass white boii bollll!!!
adding to the themes of war and white people trying to takeover the world, i also recently went to see whiskey tango foxtrot, starring tina fey. i saw sisters, which was basically tina fey and amy poehler in the movie step brothers but not as funny and wtf continued that likeness. the trailer portrayed the movie as some kind of funny ‘is this the end‘ and ‘cloverfield‘ mashup and all i got was booooring political agenda. i think the war on terror is stupid butt uhhhhhh.. somebody in hollywood really loves tina fey butttt uhhhhhhhhhhhh… maybe they should stop. i mean she’s cute if you like white men with breasts but dammit man! margot robbie, on the other hand is on fire!! just kidding, they are both equally pretty and it’s wrong for men to put women against each other in such a chauvinistic way. lol.
the movie does a good job pointing out disparages between women and men and, an even better point at driving home the fact that american white women are just nosey and need to stop butting their nose in other people’s relationships and business. if the rest of the world wanted to be like america they would just call themselves americaa, or emerikah, or amerikkka [which we ourselves might start using after trump is inaugurated].
americans do a good job assuming everyone would bee happy being american, until it’s time to vote, and then we’re all moving to canada, or mexico, or buying all the water and guns incase of a war. newsflash white people, canada and mexico don’t like you!!! let mi black ass get on a plane and go somewhere foreign though, everyone wants to stop me and take a picture like i AM jay-z or puffy or some shit.
get a grip!!!
everybody in the whole world loves us except white people and the police. &&& nobody likes the police. and to make it easier a lot of the white people are police! i mean, what.the.fuck??/!! can somebody save us from the war going on here in america before going out into the rest of the world and trying to fix their problems???//! damn.
i have been single for about five or six years now and i still don’t know how to be single. hollywood wont tell you this but, after breakups girls are almost always immediately back to the party, while it’s the guys who are left at home moping in bed and pajamas [bet this has something to do with einar’s childhood problems and would explain why women are usually insensitive]. anyway, all i know about breaking up is superman ice cream solves everything [not really].
i only wanted to see the movie because i saw damon wayans jr. in the trailer and the role looked similar to one i saw him play in ‘happy endings,’ a show i liked on abc, that unfortunately got canceled. the movie was funny and the theater full of beautiful women seeing it with their friends, i’d recommend going to see it for that reason alone fellas.
and for anyone actually wondering how to be single and get over a break up, the answer is sex. have lot’s of sex with strangers and bee merry. in fact, the underlying theme in most of the movies i’ve recently seen was ‘have sex ladies,’ except in bond, where the theme was drive sexy cars and save the world. i honestly don’t know why women are so obsessed with sex as of late butt uhhhhhh… i AM having a hard time believing it’s us men who think about sex every thirty seconds because, every ten seconds here comes a woman throwing it in our face that she can have sex with whoever she wants wherever she wants, wear whatever she wants, dance however she wants, and that she is not defined by her vagina nor the number of penises [nor hairbrush handles] that have been inside it.
which brings me to mi next point of interest…
i heard kim k got a new sex tape out butttt uhhhhhhhhh… the way mi internet set up…. sike nahhh. the truth is; i don’t watch porn
anymore &&- i never liked the kim k sex tape. there are real women walking around on the streets &&& about twenty/twenty.one% of them would probably offer you sex if you did something nice like, took them to see any of the movies mentioned above. just ask one every ten seconds for two mintues and you’ll surely get the answer you’re looking for [this is called playing the dozens]… i probably would bee careful taking a girl to see the hateful eight though which, was the exact same movie as the revenant if you ask me, except hateful had a pretty raunchy rape scene in it that i could of done without.
i will however acknowledge that twenty/twenty.one shoots up to a cool sixty/eighty.four% with the new star wars which may have been the best one after, ‘a new hope.‘ but no one seems to bee willing to acknowledge it’s strong message of initiating a modern war aimed towards india and preserving the third world and women’s rights.
ain’t shit pretty.